Discouraging boys

I nice post over body image from here, found via the gmp:

Boys are discouraged from open acknowledgement of doubts, insecurities and fears. Fears of self-disclosure and the secrets of one’s shameful inferiorities- physical, sexual, emotional- breed social and emotional isolation. In their mutual silence about common concerns, they lose the opportunity for social amelioration and modulation of shameful experience.

I have been guilty of this before

As seen on Reddit (thanks BearofHappiness):

Both men and women have genuine, valid concerns regarding the wider treatment of their gender that need to be addressed.

No matter what 'side' you're on, relegating all members of the opposite group according to your opinions of it's loudest (and usually most fundamental) members is not constructive, either to their cause, or yours. It's what makes conversation quickly crumble into individuals (rightly) defending themselves against what is essentially a personal attack.

I agree although as the title says have done the opposite as well.

"Feminism is the idea that you can create equality by focusing on the issues of only one sex."

As seen on Reddit. This is certainly true of gynocentric feminism.

"Man Up" is code for "fuck how you feel. conform to your traditional gender role"

Stolen from a redditor. Short and straight to the point, I like it.

Sometimes I just like to cite Hugo Schwyzer....

*Sigh* I usually do not agree with that guy, but when he has a point, he has a point:

Women are shamed for their sexuality in a way that men aren’t. That has innumerable consequences. For example, we raise women to be objects of desire. This is where we get the famous Paris Paradox (which goes back long before Paris Hilton), where girls learn how to be sexy long before they discover their own sexuality.

At the same time, we raise boys to believe their bodies aren’t as beautiful, as desirable, as appealing as those of girls. Boys get to be sexual, but too rarely get to trust that they’re wanted, lusted for, desired. Girls are much more visual and much more sexual than we admit; boys “long to be longed for” to a far greater extent than we realize.

Nice quote on false rape accusation vs believing rape victims

“People are making a false dichotomy out of this. It’s not either believe rape victims or give the accused due process. Believe rape victims insofar as it warrants personal kindness and aid. Believe the accused insofar as it warrants a fair trial and the presumption of innocence until guilt is proven. Saying you don’t want to rush and call someone a rapist doesn’t mean you want to rush and call someone else a liar.”

Thanks for the find Vejuz

Prejudice of the privileged

Some food for thought, from Reddit:

There's a bizarre train of thought that I see in some places [...] that say that prejudice is acceptable against groups that have it well. [...] This thinking is harmful because it implies that racism, sexism, and prejudice are only contextually bad- not inherently immoral. If there are acceptable targets for such treatment that depend on one's situation, then that means that we're all potentially subjected to it. [...] It's just that those who try to rationalize prejudice against some completely miss the point of why we don't accept prejudice against others. It's not that there are some groups that are arbitrarily designated to be protected. It's that everyone is entitled to be judged by their individual character. Anything less than that jeopardizes it for all.

Well said.

Scoundrels and personal freedom...

“The trouble with fighting for human freedom is that one spends most of one’s time defending scoundrels. For it is against scoundrels that oppressive laws are first aimed, and oppression must be stopped at the beginning if it is to be stopped at all.” —H. L. Mencken

A nice one...overheard Hugh Ristik using it